First and foremost, the plethora of Arizona Cardinals fans coming of out the wood works is sickening, sad, and infuriating. People cheering for the Cardinals, particularly against the Panthers is just downright silly. Why would you do that? To see complete chaos? To lose all credibility as a sports fan? Or, reaffirm how much you are clueless, irrational, or unreasonable? Is this the sports example of American Idol where voting for Sanjaya aka the Cardinals is the best way to go?
I mean I picked the Cardinals to beat Atlanta. Of course, not with true confidence. But, the way I saw it…the golden boy Matt Ryan was a rookie that had a great first year which was not necessarily earth shattering packaged with Michael Turner who was second in the league in rushing while playing badly on the road didn’t suggest that the Falcons would indeed win. That being said who cares it’s the Cards vs. Falcons matchup of the birds…Yeah exactly.
Before we go too far, just as a reminder there are NO Cardinals fans outside of Glendale and Arizona. I mean cmon' Let's not be complete fair weather, bandwagon fans. They lost to the Pats by 40. They finished 9-7 in one of the worst divisions ever. They lost 4 of there last 6 with huge wins over the Seattle Seahawks and Saint Louis Rams of course from their stellar division. They were last in the league in rushing by a considerable margin and were fourth to last in points allowed per game. It’s not disrespecting them or putting them down. They played poorly.
Enough with the cardinals for now. That was only the beginning of the potential collapse of the NFL. The Cowboys playing like one of the best high school teams ever was truly noteworthy. How many chances did this team need? Can anyone say, the sports equivalent of the movie “Blow?”
Next, the Eagles finishing a game in a tie against the powerful Ryan Fitzpatrick and Co. without knowing that, indeed, regular season games could finish in a tie to only on the final Sunday of the regular season make the post season which was practically 5% likely to happen compounded this sports world collapse.
Shortly after that, the Titans clearly outplayed the Baltimore Ravens but lost the game.
However, lets not forget that the Miami Dolphins won a lot of games this year. The Patriots did too after Tom Brady got his knee shreaded to pieces and single handedly crushed fantasy football seasons. How many experts said that the Patriots were doomed to fail? I mean it was shoved down our throat that there backup QB hadn’t started a game since high school and that the Patriots were doomed to fail because they hadn’t invested in a backup QB. Oops! Job well done Pats. You won when no one believed in you…just not enough. Dang.
Also, the Detroit Lions and the New York Giants share a great thing in coming: the wheels coming off and falling apart. They did it in different ways, but they both were largely disappointing. The Lions were 6-2 last year before collapsing. They demonstrated that that they could win some games and maybe could turn it around. Right?. But, I guess when you sign a QB midweek on a Tuesday or so and then he starts on Sunday, you have huge problems. Can you truly learn a playbook that quickly? Atleast, the QB had game action? Sike. He and I had the same amount of game action before his first game starting this year. Where’s Dan Orlovsky?
Afterwards, the MVP Peyton Manning led Colts lost in the playoffs again. Can this dude truly win the big game? A little known fact is that the defense and running game won him his first Super Bowl. After all, he benefited from 190 yards rushing, 2 interceptions (one for a TD), 3 field goals, and THE sexy Rex Grossman also known as the worst super bowl quarterback ever.
Not to be outdone, we have the Denver Broncos and San Diego Chargers, the quintessential underachievers as Exhibit 1A. Keep walking, not much to see here unless you love viewing disappointment and what not to do. Its like being the smartest, richest, most athletic, best looking person in the world and you do nothing with it.
Finally, this leads me to the good ole birthday boy.
Jake Delhomme had one of the worst games in the history of team sports…on his birthday. This is noteworthy, sad, pathetic, disappointing, shocking and almost brought me to tears...literally one of the worst games ever in team spots…on his birthday. He will remember this day for the rest of his life. How can he not? He almost got his brains beaten out by Steve Smith, had 6 turnovers against one of the worst defensive teams in the league at home after getting a weeks worth of rest. Did I mention Steve Smith is still currently looking for this dude on the street?
Indeed, there is Jean Van de Velde who needed a double bogey 6 to be the first Frenchmen to win the British open since 1906 and shot a triple bogey 7, my main man Tin Cup ripping the US Open, Nick Anderson in the ’94-’95 playoffs missing four consecutive free throws while being a 70% free throw shooter (one would have won the playoff game), the ‘94 Houston Oilers losing there playoff game after leading 35-3, Jana Novotna losing the Wimbledon final 6–7, 6–1, 4-6 after being one service break from 5-1 in the third set, the Mets up seven games with 17 remaining in the season went 5-12 down the stretch to finish one game behind the Phillies in the NL East and out of the playoffs. The collapse included a 1-6 homestand against the Nationals, Cardinals and Marlins to end the season, including an 8-1 rout in which 300-game winner Tom Glavine failed to get out of the first inning (SI, 2008), or the Yankees losing a series after leading 3-0, three outs away from a sweep with the greatest closer in MLB history, but this was worse.
This team would beat the Cardinals 45 out of 50 times. The Panthers had a dominant running game, staunch defense, a killer WR, history on there side, were playing at home against a team that lost 4 of there last 6 and on normal circumstances would even be in the playoffs. This was like playing EA Sports' Madden Football on the all rookie level against your grandmother. Does granny know how to turn on a PS3? Can granny cope with the controller shaking? Does she know who Tom Brady is? Can Hell can granny even burn a CD? The answer to all the aforementioned questions is an emphatic NO.
Ok, Kurt Warner bagged groceries. He has a million kids. He is a nice guy. He is rich. It’s cute. Found a story that said that he would get his kids a puppy if he made it to the Super Bowl, then he changed it to if he won the Super Bowl, then he said eh. I don’t really want to get a puppy. Man of honor and integrity! It’s all about the kids baby.
Are the Cardinals the luckiest team ever? Maybe.They played a rookie QB at home, they beat a team with a guy that had one of the worst performances in team sports at his home that was a clear favorite that scored 7 points on an incredible opening drive only to be outscored by 30+ consecutive points, and finally Larry Fitzgerald turned into a wild man against the Eagles. In this same game, the Cardinals tried to lose to the Eagles despite holding a significant advantage. Kevin Curtis and Desean Jackson can't catch like my home boy from “Little Giants” with the glue on his hands and Donovan throws balls across the middle behind players as if Inspector Gadget were streaking across the field.
So, that's the Cliff’s notes version of the potential collapse of the NFL via NFL 2009. Some people call it parity, I call it randomness. This is not ideal. And, I am convinced that this football season contributed to the recession that we are currently in. You can no longer bet on football. Exhibit 1B-J Ed Hochuli, the Pittsburgh TD that wasn’t, the Giants losing, the Cardinals winning, New England, Broncos, Seahawks, Chargers, Redskins, Cowboys, Falcons, Dolphins. All of the aforementioned teams, people, and stories contributed to our recession. I dare anyone out there to bet money on the Super Bowl tomorrow. Two prop bets for you: 3rd string Steelers rb Gary Russell will score a touchdown.Yes (+220). And, Springsteen’s Halftime Playlist: 1-The Rising, 2-Darkness on the Edge of Town, 3-Working on a Dream, 4.-Hungry Heart (+2000). I double dog you to bet either way. One of these will happen. How bad will it feel to lose out on that action! Honestly, no matter what happens, you will lose. It is NFL season 2008-2009…“Change that we can believe in!
After all that, the NFL is not collapsing. It is our real, true pastime. We should all be grateful for this professional sport. Clearly, any team can win and has a chance to win. The NFL continues to provide hope for many many people. Indeed, it is unpredictable but what isn’t. We should all embrace the NFL the good, the bad, and the ugly. If this were college football, the Cardinals would not have made the Super Bowl. Be happy we could be a nation of soccer, Snooker, F1 racing, or the WNBA. We are not…so rejoice.
Before I forget, Matt Millen was on NBC’s football night in America. He will be at the Super Bowl. And, will be providing def analysis and insight to millions upon millions. How the heck does he get another job and people are getting laid off left and right? Seriously, how. (No, seriously post comments below. How does he get another high paying job so quickly after his most recent debacle?
Nonetheless, have fun enjoy the Super Bowl and stay Sporty, Nation. This is my minority report.
